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LightningCrash
Smile like Bob, order your free LC today


Joined: 03 Apr 2003
Posts: 5020
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I see what you're saying, but there are only 44.8 million registered Republican voters in the US.

Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 9:28 am  View user's profile Send private message
Brian4o5
Colonel Cunnilinigus


Joined: 14 Oct 2004
Posts: 301
Location: Here and there.
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Were there 156 million republicans in 1952?
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Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:42 am  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address ICQ Number
Shinare
SEXNOCULAR


Joined: 17 Mar 2004
Posts: 13332
Location: Up your butt with a coconut!!
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*Boggle* WTF? Who cares, the joke is dumb, it was dumb last time I heard it with different people's names inserted, and every time before that. Pick three people you don't like, put their names in the joke, voila! You have a new non-funny, idiotic joke. Whooptie-doo. /End
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Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:44 pm  View user's profile Send private message ICQ Number
LightningCrash
Smile like Bob, order your free LC today


Joined: 03 Apr 2003
Posts: 5020
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Brian4o5 wrote: Were there 156 million republicans in 1952?


No, but the populaton of the entire US was something like 156 million in 1952.
and JFC, the accesskeys on this page make typing impossible.

Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:47 pm  View user's profile Send private message
Brian4o5
Colonel Cunnilinigus


Joined: 14 Oct 2004
Posts: 301
Location: Here and there.
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Shinare wrote: *Boggle* WTF? Who cares, the joke is dumb, it was dumb last time I heard it with different people's names inserted, and every time before that. Pick three people you don't like, put their names in the joke, voila! You have a new non-funny, idiotic joke. Whooptie-doo. /End


You OK there, Shinare? Rough day? Shinare need the bitty?
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"There are two essential rules to management. One, the customer is always right; and two, they must be punished for their arrogance." - Dogbert

Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:59 pm  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address ICQ Number
LightningCrash
Smile like Bob, order your free LC today


Joined: 03 Apr 2003
Posts: 5020
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He's on his period. You should be more sensitive towards his PMS.

Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:05 pm  View user's profile Send private message
Shinare
SEXNOCULAR


Joined: 17 Mar 2004
Posts: 13332
Location: Up your butt with a coconut!!
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LightningCrash wrote: He's on his period. You should be more sensitive towards his PMS.


Thank you.
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Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 1:14 pm  View user's profile Send private message ICQ Number
MO8IUS
I's L N B !!!!!!! Sheesh!


Joined: 24 Mar 2003
Posts: 461
Location: Norman, OK
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less talky, more jokey, me thinky
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Post Thu Feb 07, 2008 8:26 pm  View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website MSN Messenger ICQ Number
LightningCrash
Smile like Bob, order your free LC today


Joined: 03 Apr 2003
Posts: 5020
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Less feces, more fetchin'?

Post Fri Feb 08, 2008 6:38 am  View user's profile Send private message
nimda
Curator of art Faggory


Joined: 18 Mar 2003
Posts: 12180
Location: on a mountain in colorado
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A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his Hoohoo.

According to the Nurse attending, the patient's girl friend found the Ring in his pants pocket and she got so mad at him, she used petroleum Jelly to slip the ring on his hoohoo while he was asleep.

I don't know what's worse:

1) Having your girl friend find out you're married.

2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your hoohoo.

3) Or finding out your hoohoo fits through your wedding ring.
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Post Wed Feb 13, 2008 11:59 am  View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger ICQ Number
Brules
M F C E O


Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Posts: 11074
Location: Konnichiwa, bitches.
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Wow, that was bad......
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Post Wed Feb 13, 2008 1:33 pm  View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
Bobacus
Gov. Surplus FTW!


Joined: 28 Dec 2004
Posts: 741
Location: Watching you make out at the movies
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Now, I’m sure many of you have encountered little shits in supermarkets. Little kids running about and knocking things over, being rude, walking all over their parents, you know the kind. But the worst are the biters.

Yes, those little cunts that feel it is okay to bite you whenever they feel like it.

Okay, here’s the best part. A biter got me today when I was grocery stopping. He broke the fucking skin, too. This was when the gears started turning, the moment I saw a tiny sprinkle of blood on the little shit’s teeth as he was grinning at me like the little cunt he is.

I made my eyes get wide, and started screaming “SHIT! SHIT!.” Now, my good friend, Tom we’ll call him, was there too, and he instantly picked up on it. He started shouting “FUCK! MAYBE HE DIDN’T GET IT! FUCK!.” By now, the kid is scared shitless and starts crying, and instantly, Mizz Mom appears out of nowhere and starts getting pissy at us for yelling at her kid.

Here’s the kicker, I look her straight in the eye and say, “Mam, get your son tested as soon as possible, he just bit me and I’m… I’m FUCKING HIV POSITIVE.”

And now there is silence. Not a peep in the entire store. The brat knows he just fucked up big time because his mom isn’t defending his ass. She just stares at me wide eyed. I walk away from them, buy my shit from the wide eyed cashier, all the while blood is dripping from my calf, making a nice little trail on the floor. And, just s we leave, we start to hear the mother sobbing. Sobbing like the cunt she is.

I have never felt any more satisfaction than the moment I heard that sob.
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Post Sat Jul 26, 2008 6:04 pm  View user's profile Send private message
TehDanMan
Guerilla Ontologist


Joined: 01 Jul 2003
Posts: 13143
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That is hilarious!
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Post Sat Jul 26, 2008 7:24 pm  View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
[FUKM] ICE COLD
lan party avoiding douche


Joined: 19 Mar 2003
Posts: 1364
Location: Its cold just touch it.. touch it!
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I was having trouble with my computer so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like MissionControl and asked him to come over.

Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

I used to like Eric.
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Post Thu Sep 04, 2008 12:51 am  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address ICQ Number
detox
Naaaaaah. NaaaaaFLAC.


Joined: 20 Mar 2003
Posts: 4317
Location: Durant
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the jerk store called... they're all outta you!
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Post Thu Sep 04, 2008 7:39 am  View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website ICQ Number
nimda
Curator of art Faggory


Joined: 18 Mar 2003
Posts: 12180
Location: on a mountain in colorado
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A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says,
'OK old fart, time for you to retire.'
The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle
ALL of these chickens.
Look what it has done to me
Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?'
The young rooster says,
'Beat it: You are washed up
and I am taking over.'
The old rooster says,
'I tell you what, young stud.
I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop.' The young rooster laughs.
'You know you don't stand a chance, old man.
So, just to be fair,
I will give you a head start.'
The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He is only about 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining fast. The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch
when he sees the roosters running by.
The Old Roster is squalking
and running as hard as he can.
The Farmer grabs his shotgun and
- BOOM -
he blows the young rooster to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head and says,
'Dammit.....
third gay rooster I bought this month.'
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Post Mon Sep 08, 2008 1:28 pm  View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger ICQ Number
Shinare
SEXNOCULAR


Joined: 17 Mar 2004
Posts: 13332
Location: Up your butt with a coconut!!
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Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom; the other the groom broom.


The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!"

"IMPOSSIBLE !" said the groom broom.

"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"
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Post Tue Sep 30, 2008 1:10 pm  View user's profile Send private message ICQ Number
SuperDuck
Being Railroaded by the Dan-Man


Joined: 18 Mar 2003
Posts: 563
Location: , location, location!
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wah wah waaaaahhhhh
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Post Tue Sep 30, 2008 2:14 pm  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address ICQ Number
[email protected]
Sand Filter


Joined: 27 Aug 2008
Posts: 11
Location: Oklahoma City
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A guy is waiting for what seems like an eternity for his doctor in the examination room. Finally, the doctor walks in and says, "Look Jim, you're going to have to stop masturbating."

The guy says, "But Doc, why?"

"So I can examine you."
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Post Fri Oct 10, 2008 11:57 am  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
[email protected]
Sand Filter


Joined: 27 Aug 2008
Posts: 11
Location: Oklahoma City
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A woman is in the examination room with her doctor.
She says, "Give me a kiss, doc."
Shocked by the audacity of the woman, the doctor exclaims, "I'm not going to kiss you!"
"Aw c'mon doc, kiss me."
"NO!"
"Please doc, just one kiss!" demands the woman.
"Look lady, it's just not appropriate; I probably shouldn't even be fucking you!"
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Post Sat Oct 11, 2008 3:30 am  View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
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